Whether you’re in a long term relationship, a brand new talking stage or your single girl era, the question still stands…
How can I tell if someone is, will be or still is worth my time, efforts and vulnerability?
A big teller is his spiritual maturity in Christ. Your partner’s level of spiritual maturity reflects in the amount of respect, perseverance, loyalty, honesty and patience he shows to others and more importantly, to you.
And isn’t that every Christian woman’s prayer? That her partner’s love would mirror God’s love; reliable, loyal, true, patient, and kind.
We’ve curated a detailed list of signs of spiritual maturity to help our ABIDE readers pinpoint the diamonds in the ruff.
What is Spiritual Maturity?
The definition of spiritual maturity is someone who has an ongoing, everyday relationship with God. It’s an individual who seeks the Lord faithfully and whose life mirrors the Word.
Spiritual Maturity in the Bible
Before we even get to the list, it’s important that we take our cues from God’s word, the ultimate source to all the burning questions we might have as Christians.
Maturity in Christianity can easily be pinpointed throughout the Scriptures. We find the fruits of the spirit indicated in Galatians 5:22–23; “love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” We understand from this Scripture that these 9 qualities are characteristics of spiritual growth, a mature Christian and a man worth your time and energy.
8 characteristics of a Mature Christian
1. He Can Regulate His Emotions – Ephesians 4:26 – 32
Every mature Christian is rooted and grounded emotionally thus spiritually.
If your man can control his emotions, not allowing fleeting feelings to dictate his actions, girl he’s a keeper. This means he surrenders his way for God’s wisdom and peace. Now, I don’t mean he doesn’t get angry or irritated. It means he still treats you and those around him with respect when he is angry or overwhelmed with emotion.
2. He Considers Others & Practices Generosity – Matthew 23:11
I’m sure we could all agree that a kind and thoughtful man is at the top of our relationship list. Jesus’ life was meant to be cultivated through our own. Seeing Jesus was incredibly generous, when a man gives his time, resources, talents, wisdom, money wisely…it’s a clear sign he knows God as his provider. He know that another person’s gain is not his loss.
3. He Offers Advice Grounded in Faith – Proverbs 12:26
Another attribute of spiritual maturity is when your partner speaks words of wisdom that point back to the Word of God. It shows that he studies the Bible and spends time with God. Green flags all around!
4. He Prioritizes Quality Time with God – 1 Chronicles 16:11
Maturity in Christ also looks like having a relationship with God outside Sunday service. A man who pursues a relationship like this, taking time to read the Bible, studying the Word and seeking His face continually shows a deep love, respect and reverence for God. Definitely husband material!
5. He Finds Opportunities for Growth in Hard Times – James 1:2–3
When met with difficulty, a spiritually mature man will seek God. He realizes that it’s in these times that God builds character, redirects steps and speaks to hearts. He takes time to process his feelings as he perseveres having faith that God will provide.
6. He Has Good Judgment (“doesn’t lean to his own understanding”) – Proverbs 3:5–6
If your partner can rightly access a situation and make a wise choice, it’s a clear sign that the Holy Spirit dwells inside his heart.
7. He Thinks Before He Speaks – James 1:19
As mentioned in the Bible, a common sign of maturity is thinking before speaking… especially in conflict. This corresponds to emotional maturity and not being led by emotions that come and go. A man who can control his words is a man of integrity.
8. He’s Growing in His Relationship with God – Galatians 2:20
Ironically, your “perfect” partner knows that he isn’t perfect and never will be. He realizes his need for God’s grace and protection. Consequently, he makes a habit of learning more about God’s character and prioritizes growing closer to Him; aligning His life to that of Jesus Christ while keeping His grace and love at the forefront of His mind
